so friends.. tell me about that..

alright.. so its been almost a year since the last time ga kita mi sa adtong mga tao i called "friends"..
during my first few months away from them, it feels like i'll be sick if i can't talk to them withing 24 hours.. if i cant check on them, and tell them how's my day...if i cant tell them how boring my stay was.. and even let them know, whats the cool thing that made me smile that day.. then school started, so as my busineess, that i barely have the tim eto have a long talk to anyone online, but still i always do my best to email them almost everyday no matter how busy i am, just to let me know im doing fine here and i miss them...

but lately.. something just hit me.. and made me do something i cant even think of doing before.. NOT CHECKING ON MY FRIEDS..

so yeah.. i stopped messaging them, and even leaving some IM on messenger.. i just totally detached myself from them.. if it was before, even thinking about it, mamatay tingali ko if ill totally do this.. but guess what? I JUST DID.. wala nako ni message nila.. and do you know what? they dont even wonder why wala nako ni msg... they didnt even noticed it...

this event pushed me one step back,.. and let me view the whole picture.. if there is really something wrong.. after realized everything, i forced to picked my self and pushed it two steps forward...

i thought before if the time will come that me and my friends wont be that friends, i would probably die.... but hey.. its not that bad afterall.. i dont even feel a single pain..

few things i realized:
-stop limiting yourself by living at the past... just get over it and live to the present.
-why bother care to people who didnt even bother to care for you at all?
-also by not stucking yourself up with OLD FRIENDS.. its always refrreshing to have NEW ONES..

i've been doing alot of shit to those people for how many years... and i dont mind doing all of those favors for them.. coz i feel "obliged" doing it... but guess what? f*ck that now... im to tired of doing stuff for others.. those people who will just talk to me coz they need something from me.. they dont even hang out with me coz "they want to hang out" with me.. so screw that!!

also, i was stucked for how many years in that line "oh, im afraid maybe my friends will hate me".. enough of those "we dont like you anymore coz you changed.." or "we hate you coz you're like this or that".. do me a favor will you? PLEASE GROW UP!

i wonder when wil those guys starts to think about their future.. like seriously THINK ABOUT IT! enough of those just roaming around with friends.. well, its ok to hang out every once in a while, but hey, we're not growing younger..

its just funny now, how those people msg'd me.. knowing im going home.. sayin "hey, wassup? heard youre coming home.. i cant wait to see you!" LIKE REALLY?! C'MON!! LIKE, SERIOUSLY?!
its just bad now coz what if they mean it this time, and wala na noon ko naminaw.. well.. too bad..

if you wanna have something, ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS work for it.. and once you have it, do not let it go, coz maybe that will be the last time you can have it...

it is totally this time that i know who my TRUE FRIENDS are...
and im happy i found them in the long run..


so yeah.. basically.. thats all about it..
^_^
im way way waaaay better now..
better than i can imagine,..